Exam

Today, as I walked out of the exam hall after a 90 minute duel with the question paper, my brain was playing the recorded message : "It's over now... just be happy !! "... but my heart somehow wouldn't buy it... not today !!!

To me - a 22-year old who has been nothing but a student - 'exam' is not an unfamiliar word... I could recognise one whatever you call it :

Class test... monthly test... quarterly exam... half yearly exam... annual exam... pre-board exam... board exam... all public school exam...
Common exam... tuition tests.. coaching class preparatory exam... 12th final board exam.. TamilNadu Professional course entrance exam(TNPCEE)...
Continuous assessment tests... Mid-semester tests .. semester exams...
mock CAT.. Common Admission test(CAT)... Graduate Aptitude Test in Engineering(GATE)..
Graduate Record Exam(GRE).. Test of English as a ForIEgn Language(TOEFL)..
Surprise quiz.. midterm... open book exams... class finals..

I would express my hatred, no matter how exciting they could make it sound because the objective has always been the same : A question paper... a time limit... ATTACK.....

Let's ask people... Has anyone ever told you (or will ever tell you) in real life.. "You've got 2 hours to do this stuff. Now Start." Probably not... the concept of a time trail ends with exams unless you are a professional quizzer or an ardent game show participant... Nevertheless, a timed exam is more popular than its other less valued counterparts like... take home exam, report, projects, presentations etc... at least for an Indian undergrad student...

Thinking of it... An exam comes in three phases :
Preparation phase : papers/notes all around the room... study holidays... no TV for a month ... ear plugs... late night coffees/biscuits... ALARM CLOCK... terrace... time table... night out... portions.. syllabus... units.. chapters.. Xerox... previous question papers.. question paper got 'leaked' news... spare pens/pencils... sharpener.. eraser... geometry box... writing pad... ruler.. watch.. hall ticket...

Time trial phase: Attacking the paper.. time allocation... "which goes first".. and an array of popular cheating techniques that is worth a research in itself : copying... bit paper... passing the answer paper... none of which I've tried out merely due to lack of mettle..

Waiting-for-the-result phase : the time between an exam and when you get your score is probably the most blissful period.... when the day comes... the excitement begins : the thrill of waiting for the answer paper... checking the scores over the internet... secretly looking for other student's score.. comparing and totaling the already distributed scores... groveling for a couple of more marks here and there... the re-totaling.. arrear exams... revaluation... etc...

Just go to a school and announce the cancellation of an exam... Its by far the quickest way you could make an entire crowd happy... For me.. being in Grad school has not changed anything..
The point being, next semester... the project and the other graduate level course that I have registered for are not going to have an exam and what i wrote today was probably the last ever timed exam of my life... Isn't that such an exciting thought ??

But TODAY, as I walked out of the exam after the 90 minute duel... my heart cried.. "Hmm... what an unceremonious ending to a series of the ever-loathed event... If not in the past.. as of now.. I miss this feeling.. the adrenaline rush... the exam fever.. the associated memories... Its ALL OVER???? "

Couldn't help but think about the lines from Robert Frost's - 'Reluctance' that I recently came across:
Ah, when to the heart of man
Was it ever less than a treason
To go with the drift of things,
To yield with a grace to reason,
And bow and accept the end
Of a love or a season?


If you were to ask me... "Would you rather take one more ?? "..
I would think for a while and say "Yes... I guess I love to hate exams.. "



PS : This lucky 50th post of mine got out of my hard disk ahead of its incomplete predecessors blog-1.txt and blog-2.txt that got shelved due to lack of time...